Mr. Emir's Open Letter to Ivana

'Good day Mrs. Ivana,

and I wish you EVERY DAY a good day. Even though I have read the rules, I do not know exactly how this forum functions, or whether this letter will reach You. In reality, my only motive is to write You a couple of words and to share with You part of the excitement which I felt tonight, while I watched Ivana and Senad's story. The emotions which took hold of me while I watched this episode were like a storm which disturbed the quiet layers of the post-war detritus in which our thoughts and fears ensconced themselves, in the desire to forget and bury that evil time in forgetfulness. In this particular world, "underneath the veil", we make attempts to live, to breathe, and to go ahead. I hope that in what follows, some additional information will make clearer the trains of thought that are directing the flow of my writing. I hope that I am not going to make use of any inappropriate words which could in any way hurt anyone, You in the least. I would just like to write that my name is Emir, that I am 44 years old, married and father to a 2-year old son. I live in Sarajevo, and have lived there throughout the war years. Beginning with a feeling of incredulity, this war has taken me through a thousand "why's" and "because of what's", through terror and fear, and has pushed me through the primal instincts of animal survival and the struggle for bare existence; the war has caused immeasurable suffering, and, at the time, has brought me face to face with the breath of my own annihilation, and even very close to a fervent death wish as a way to escape the sheer horror... This war has changed the tides of my own life, and given a bloody birth to my new Bosnia and Hercegovina. Nothing remains the same, however one has to reconcile oneself with the following words: "mine", "yours", "theirs".. - and these words are resounding ever louder, and imposing themselves as the new constants of our existence, of our tragedies and divisions, of our shared mistrust and in general of our multi-faceted apartheid and common alienation. Thus, even I, who had previously always considered myself above all as an open man of good will and intentions, have now embraced this new "litmus" identity. Tonight's TV story has wrought a storm in "my life under the veil", squeezing tears from my benumbed feelings, and - literally, "as the tears were drying on my face", and before the detritus of my "daily tomorrows" has covered me again, I would hereby like to direct to You these few words of gratitude, for the whiteness of human purity which has obviously been implanted by Your upbringing, as well as granted to You by God; luckily, you have been able to preserve it and remain whole. Although the humble apartment where I live with my family is in reality quite small - our doors are wide open if your path should ever bring You to Sarajevo. May God take good care of You, and may He give us more people like You.
With all my respect,
Emir
emsoftic@bih.net.ba Sarajevo,
15/04/2005.'